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As God or Nature Always Hoped, by Ray Zwarich

To all the Really Good Ones, and to all in peril on land or sea:

Little Bobby, (ahuh-ahuh .. he had the goofiest stupidest laugh ya ever heard; clever boy that one, wearing the mask of a dunce clown), one of the best 'writers' himself our young nation has yet produced, wrote:

"O all the thoughts that ever strung a knot in my brain, I would go insane if they couldn't be sung".

Yea ... Ain't that how it is? It's a heckuva thing. (That's what Thaddeus always said. I can see his face now).

Writing is something a lot of folks do, and something that all who can should do much more. It's good for the human soul to make real substance from our jumbled thoughts, something we can hold in our hand, and even 'hand' to others. Our writing will be something we ourselves can revisit at other times, to learn more about who we were, as we try so earnestly to discover who we are becoming.

Writing is good for the human soul. Every girl must surely create her own treasured secret diary, which she'll hide under her pillow. 'Course young men will harrumph and call it a 'journal', and bind it in leather, and carry it around where all can see it ... LOL ..C'mon ... Give the lads a break.. they're only tyrin' t' impress the ladies ...LOL...Oh and the goddess in human woman flesh herself, Shania Twain, taught them ALL to say, "THAT don't impress me much".

"But... but .... I'll buy you a Chevrolet, Darlin', I promise", the poor stupid man whimpewred... LOL .... Sheesh ..... the Human Comedy. The sheer spectacle........ Always two masks. One weeps in soul rendering sobs. Ahh ... But one DOES laugh. The eternal courtship dance. 

Ahh, but 'writing' is one thing. Being cursed with being a 'writer' is much different. Being a 'writer' is a sub-set of being a 'junkie'. There are ALL kinds of junkies. Insanity can be a rather serious 'withdrawal symptom', after all. Better to write, like Little Bobby said.  

Don't we all know 'set theory'? They taught it to us as young children when I was in grade school in the 1950s. When I started kindergarten in '53, the war was still fresh in every citizen's mind. The warriors felt proud of having fought, of having successfully defended their women and children, to secure the safety of The Tribe. The women had done their part, even besides keeping home fires warm. Every girl showed a real woman's true mettle. They had rolled up their sleeves to do the heavy work that their men usually do, besides keeping babies fed, and old grandfathers from getting too lonely in sadness as all their dear 'Danny boys' fought, and so many died, (almost 400,000 in WW2 .. and that's a LOT of free swingin' dicks in the cold dark damp dirt, boys). 

It was a good time in America for children. The nation felt strong and confident, as young Jack Kennedy was still wastin' his time chasing the girls, but was nonetheless, steadily growing into a man. All thought it was the dawn of a 'New Era'. The torch would be passed. Truth and Justice were "the American way". All the brave young fathers and mothers would cherish our children and teach them to 'save the world' for God and Freedom.

Well ... Sure ... How it sounds now?... but with 400,000 of the flower of yer cherished boys still lying so fresh in the dirt, it sounded a little different t' them folks than it might to folks today.

That's just the way them folks was. They were proud of what they done, but for just a time, the spirit of genuine Humility flew...ahhh... but for just a few fleetin years, they felt a responsibility to become more, to become better, to make real 'progress' for all Humanity.

They felt deeply of the Good Spirit in us ... And its more than a mere coincidence that at that time, if any lonely lad should want to see a naked girl, well ... he'd just have to be real nice to one, treat her well, promise to be faithful forevermore. Just a few tiny little things like that.

Yea ... sure ... In dangerous dark alleys where rats scurried as one walked along, one could find pictures of naked girls, or even some poor girls who plied among the garbage, but only a few of the most daring boys would venture to such places. If yez wanted a "nice clean girl", ya had to make SERIOUS promises to her.  

And when this proud young nation, flush in victory, taught its children, it did not merely teach us 'what to think'. No ... There was true wisdom in the land. Ole Socrates himself even commanded respect. When they set out to teach their darling children, they taught us 'how' to think, not merely 'what' to think.

If we only knew 'set theory' now, which I pretty much had down by third grade, (if not before, the blocks in the circles thing?), we would know how dingbat nutball crazy this whole "Critical Race Theory" thing is. Are black folks just TRYIN' t' get ALL the white folks to hate them? 

RUB people's noses in OTHER people's doo-doo? Okey doke buddy. You better back YOUR effin' ass on back up, Kunta.....Ya 'SEE'? .... Ya get t' be EQUAL. That's IT!! And me hand's only on the hilt .. You SEE? You want to see the blade flash? The deed will be done before YOUR steel is even in your hand.

Ya 'see' how it is? Not every man ya meet will be a samurai, but still, every man worthy of the name will spit between his own feet, and tell you, this is MINE! 242 to 42 is still the number them 'boyz in the hood' better know best.

We WANT t' share with ya. Effin criSAKES!! ... We WANT to ... Ya SEE? ...You have every RIGHT to the same share as me. But you want to take mine, do ya? You know I have babes counting on me? Right? And still ya want to take mine? Eh? Well..YER one, aintcha'?

ArrgguurrHmmm ...'scuse me. An old man's teeth grind out loud ... as he stands up slowly his hand falling quite prominently to the rough leather-wrapped hilt. (The feather guides his hand quickly to the leather, and the leather holds tight to the steel as if it grew there).

You want MINE, you say? You want to take food from MY baby to feed YOURS? 

Ya 'see'? Ain't that how it is? Don't you 'see' what complete idiots yer bein'????? 

Believe me, boys, Caliban is a much (MUCH!) better friend than an enemy. My palms are up t' ya. 

If ya knew 'set theory' you would know that even though The Man is white, most white folks are slaves too, just like YOU! The 'set' of the Ruling Masters, cracking their whips, is made up of white people, sure enough, but it's just a tiny little circle inside the great BIG circle of ALL white people.

And all those other white people aren't the ones who enslaved you. They aren't the ones who rule over you know. Most white folks are as enslaved as YOU are, and ALWAYS have been. Take yer effin' Cult of Victimhood and shove it somewhere's it's warm and dark. You know where the word 'slave' came from, Kunta? Yer talkin' to a Slavic person here. 'Slav' for short.  

Only a fool makes people who should be his allies into enemies. Only an idiot would put his hand on his steel and say "let's go boys" when every direction is uphill, and you're outnumbered 6-1.

Well ... Anyway ... (cough) A good spirit thrived for a brief time after the terrible war had ended. They tried their best to 'do good'. They tried to, anyway. And for a while, they taught their cherished children HOW to think.

Well ... We all know what happened. We learned fairly well. And when we grew up, we used the very faculties with which our nation had gifted us, to 'see' that in a new ragin' cruel war, that our nation now wanted US to fight, our nation, our own homeland, had become something as evil and sinister as the deadly fascist spirits our own parents had vanquished.  

Yea ... Well .... They taught us 'how' to think, and their wages earned was to have us rebel.

Well ... These people are mean and nasty, but they sure ain't stupid. They stopped teaching kids 'how' to think, and re-doubled all efforts to force children to think what AND 'how' THEY wanted them to think.

And now we're a nation populated with young adults who were deprived of proper education. Well ... a human polity can always count on the natural wellspring of rebellious renewal of our spirit in each generation, and these young adults today are, if anything, MUCH more 'cognitive' of the details of the mess we're all in than we ever even were 'back then', but they were deprived of those invaluable lessons in the patterns and form of human thought, of logic, (how many could even define 'syllogism'?), of the magic liberating power of Reason itself.

And this does Passion rule over them. 

Yea ... we may yet rut and strut like stupid beasts, but Reason makes us 'Humanity'.

It is Reason alone that makes us something MUCH more than merely a whole bunch of stinking farting rutting humans, the stupid beasts we ARE. 

C'mon, folks..We ALL know that our youth's raging anger is not merely 'just'. We ALL know in the just anger lies our nation's ONLY hopes for the future. But these young people are not thinking clearly. Their passions are merely raging. They'll be calm. Tears of rage fall as do tears of every sort. People feel calmer after. And that's when we think MUCH better.

It was me youngest, me darlin' baby girl, made her stupid papa quit smoking. A wee slip she was, not even yet in school. She'd stand in front of me, with a knotted look on her young face, a look that said, "I though my papa was 'wise' but look how STUPID he really is", and she'd say, "those are going to kill you Papa. Why do you do that?"

O my god. Ahh ..fer crissakes .. It was the exact words my Dji-Dji always used, even in his pidgin' English, (which is the best that wise and brilliant man ever cared to learn to speak). Upon witnessing human stupidity, he'd shake his head and say, "Why they do like that?" 

Ole Socrates had nuthin' on my Dji-Dji. The wise brujo, Kurosawa, even made a movie about him. I cried like a baby boy when I saw 'Dersu-Uzala', though I was already a young apprentice swinging a hammer. "CaptiTAN!", the old man shouted in the voice of pure happy joy itself, from the nearest hilltop, as the two dear friends so sadly parted. "DerSU!" the handsome young Russian officer shouted back at the old 'Gol, waving as eagerly as if the old man had been a beautiful young lover. 

"Why you do like that, Papa?", a young girl said to her stupid brute of a 'papa', just as the brave young lass, Greta, now looks on us ALL, with that SAME look in her eyes, and says to all Humanity. 

Well ... As young Bud Black would say, "life comes down to a few key moments". Yea ... sez Caliban to Humanity. Doesn't it though? Cantcha' hear what the young lass is tellin' us? It's NOW or NEVER fer us ALL! 

Every single ONE! Ya 'see'?

Humanity was ALWAYS destined to come to this most crucial 'cusp' in our long tragic History, as our Demon Beast nature has bedeviled us cruelly, even as the Angels of Reason have labored so mightily to save us from ourselves. And there stands the pure beauty of this child Greta, bravely, a tear in one corner of her magic eyes, but looking at us quizzically, as she has just recently discoved that all the grown ups are as stupid and childish as all the children. 

"And I just want you to know, that as we watched you discover, that no one would be true, I meself was among the ones who said it was just such a childish thing t' do..gah ..Tears of Rage .. Tears of Grief..gah..Why must I ALWAYS be the thief? What dear daughter 'neath the sun, cxould treat a father so?..gah.." Even Little Bobby, even the strange little vagabond troubadour, grew up t' have a papa's silver back. 

Well ... that moment was not that stupid young papa's first epiphany, but like them all, it knocked him in the head like a 9 lb. hammer. I laid down the Devil's own 'little fire' and never picked it up, not a single puff, since. (Well ... Ole Caliban does still enjoy a pipe now and again, but the 'little smoke' is the same as the brujo Don Juan had taught of).

Epiphanies are 'terrible things'. But they DO happen. Sometimes, they can even happen to a WHOLE buncha folks ALL at (more or less) the same time. Saul fell in the dirty road, and rose, only a moment later, as Paul.uhuh..uhuh... "Come on without. Come on within". When Quinn gets here .... All will jump fer joy" ... ahh ... that little Bobby will just NEVER leave an old man alone, the 'rascal' ... 

A moment will come, SOON, when all Humanity will suffer the greatest agony that God or Nature, (take yer pick), ever planned fer us. One way or another, that moment will come. It may come in fire, and it may come in a joy far more terrible than ANY ever yet felt by woman nor man. 

But 'List I say! 'List well. Quinn doesn't seem to have arrived yet, but Caliban has come, from a place few have ever been and lived to tell about it. I've come t' tell ye that the moment is no longer in some distant time in a hazy future. One way or another, the moment is SOON upon us, boys and girls.

The end is not yet revealed. Bullets of red sweat will be falling from every brow before it will be. Our very Spirits will bleed. They will bleed our hope and pain. Our Human Pathos. They will all beg and whimper, lower lips all stuck out like babes' and a quiverin', they will beg to the Holy Spirit of Human Love itself.

Only THEN will Humanity 'see' The Light. Will it melt our eyeballs and turn them to cinder in an instant, as it did the poor folks in Hiroshima? Or will we 'see' a New Dawn, as Humanity awakens to be what God or Nature always hoped so fervently that Humanity could become.

Well ... I'll raise me hand and swear that I KNOW that moment is coming MUCH sooner than folks seem to realize. I can't, (at least not yet), tell ya HOW I do, but, believe me, I DO! 

A cusp moment in Human History, a moment that was ALWAYS inevitable, a moment that every human prophet has predicted for 10,000 years, is SOON upon us.

Well ... Shit ... Ya think a dumb ole ape wouldn't tell ya? This is just ole Caiban here, and 'they' didn't tell me the ending ... LOL ... They DID say one VERY mysterious thing.  

"Do NOT fear. If you are afraid, you will DIE!" Yea ... well ... That's sure enough what they said .. LOL ..What's it mean? Hey, do I look like a witch doctor? 

Don't despair, folks. Quinn's one a the REALLY really good ones. That ole boy'll be here. When? 'Should I know? Hey ... I'm just tryin' t' sit here in me tree And enjoy this banana ... Go ask Little Bobby ... See what he knows ... He always knew old Quinn better than I did ..

Bent Birch Farm
22 November (Ah, Jack, we're spllin' a drop fer ya, we hardly knew ye)